25 Things Learnt Through The Past 25 Years

Twenty -five Years, quarter a century, old enough to witness the loss of beloved ones.  Twenty -five years of goodness, blessings, and closeness to family and friends.  Fall and rise, fall and raise, then, fall and raise.  Stuck in a circle of high frequencies followed by lower ones. A lot of trials and errors led to many achievements and failures.

I feel like I am scratching the surface of the surface of the realm of knowing myself. I became more grateful. I try to live the moment. Somehow, I became calmer and happier. I have been freed from chains, and maybe got chained by other ones. I noticed recently that sometimes I see myself from outside. I stop and judge my emotions; regret some and got surprised by others.

Lastly, I would like to thank my mother, my father, my grandfather, the rest of my family, my friends, my teachers, and my mentors. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

From Khaled; greetings of peace and believe to the whole world.

Now, let me write 25 things I learnt during these 25 years.

     1- Wear your weakness as armor.

I once was watching Game of Thrones (a well-known series); I came across a dialogue between Jon Snow and Teryon Lannister (Characters in the series). Jon snow was a bastard (Illegal son), he was ashamed of how people looked at him. Teryon in this dialogue told him: “Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you”.  This saying from Teryon stayed present within my life for the past seven years. It really worked out. Whenever I put the things that I am ashamed of on the table, I no longer feel that shame no more.

      2- Try to do more things IRL (In Real Life)

For generation Z, social media was there since they knew themselves. We sometimes forget about the real world. Social media is fun but believe me (Social Media addict and an introvert), real life is much funnier. As my idol (Daniel Bourke) said once; “Less social media, more social”.

      3- Be confident!

Being confident is the #1 skill you must develop to success. No matter how good you are, without this skill, you won’t thrive.  Some people like old me, have imposter syndrome. I was getting better and better, but I was feeling like I still cannot compete with others. Until I spoke to Ibrahim, he told me; ‘You are above average in every aspect, you only need to cultivate your ability to be confident’.

     4- Liptonaize yourself

Ibrahim also talked to me about marketing. He told me; ‘Lipton is one of the largest tea brands in the world, still a lot of people do not like their tea’s taste’. He continued, ‘If I talked about you to other people, I would make a nicer image to them about you than if you were the one who talks about himself”. Marketing yourself is highly related to the confidence feeling within. If you are confident, you can market yourself easily.

     5- Don’t limit your progress by time.

In one of my first days in my first job, I was talking to my manger (Engineer Mohammad Shhadat). He gave me priceless advice. He said, ‘Do not limit your improvement by time’. He really nailed it. I was always giving myself time for studying, programming, and reading. I was limiting my improvement by time. Instead, I should do not think about time in the subjects related to my improvement. I should think about time in the secondary subjects, like watching series, playing video games, hanging out. Lose the sense of time while you work. Immerse yourself in the moment when you study. Dive in the flow state.

      6- Start with the frog.

During my exams period in school, my father was always saying to me; “Finish studying, then do whatever you want to do. Do not start with playing, study, finish it, then play”. My father’s advice can be extended within any field itself via the Eating The Frog Technique. In the gym, start with the hardest exercise. In studying, start with the hardest subject. In work, start with hardest task.  I remember, the exams days were the best days of the semester to me. It was the days where I play video games the most. Whenever I was talking to anyone about it, they wonder. The secret behind me feeling the best during exams is laying within the fact that I was eating the frog everyday during the semester.

     7- Everything is going to be alright.

This one is obtained from my own life experience. Time passes, so pain. Whatever (I literally mean whatever) makes you feel anxious will pass, as easy as that.

     8- Nothing is more important than health.

Once, I was complaining to my uncle about not finding a job. He said to me; ‘man, do not take it seriously. The most important thing is health. Ask me, ask me’. My uncle passed away on 25/7/2023 due to cancer. His quote will always be with me.

     10– spend more time with people you hate.

Sometimes, I get a feeling of hating someone. The cure for this feeling is spending more time with the person you felt that you are hating. Spending more    time together will take away that feeling of hate. I am talking about my personal experience.

     11- Ask

Nothing will happen, just ask. I was a person who calculates and thinks whether I should ask or not. Until Engineer Anwar told me; ‘Just ask, nothing will happen to you. If they reject, be it’.

     12- Vulnerability is a superpower.

The vulnerability idea changes my life perspective. I was a person who cannot accept other opinions and critiques. For example, whenever I saw a tweet outside my realm of acceptance, I become angry and I delete twitter.  And once, I listened to Brene Brown talking about being vulnerable. It is a very hard skill to master. I can explain being vulnerable in an example; if someone critiques something you really love, you really believe in, you really convinced with, you do not need to feel bad and overwhelmed. You do not need to feel the urge to explain your situation to that person. Just say to them, OK, I understand your critiques and thank you.  Then, continue whatever that thing is, as if nothing happened.

     13- Authenticity is a superpower.

Be authentic. Not being authentic will consume your power and bandwidth. This power and bandwidth can be used for more important things.

     14- I will be glad forever for being a KFUPMer

This is one of the most things that I am proud of. I even think it is the number 1 in my list of the things thst I am proud of. KFUPM is a story that cannot be understood by anyone other than KFUPMers. Its a full experience of life. You live there, you study there, you make friends there, you work there, you eat there, you cry there, you laugh there, you thicken your skin there, you become emotionally stable there, you understand others there, etc. I thank the moment where I heard the first time about KFUPM. It became my dream since I was in the middle school. Thankfully, I fullfiled that dream.

     15- Being top of a hierarchy does not mean being top of an another one.

I was thinking that whenever a person is at the top of an academic or professional hierarchy; then, they are at the top of the mental (thinking) hierarchy. Lately, I got punched on the face many times, which changed my previous thoughts about this issue. For instance, I have seen many professors who work in the top universities in the world tweeting vary hard racist tweets. Also, I saw mangers and CEOs who are very subjective and who have childish attitudes. I also learnt that the best thing in dealing with these kind of people is to hypocrite them for the better purpose.

     16- In university, learn to read, write and speak.

Jordan Peterson once said; “learn to think, learn to speak, learn to read, learn to write. It makes you a superpower; an individual superpower”. For me, no matter what your major is, these skill are the most important skills you should focus to learn during university. Writing articulates your thinking, reading enriches your mind, and speaking makes you deliver.

     17- People are like camels

I have not heard this Hadith before professor Zain Yamani told me about it.

Narrated `Abdullah bin `Umar:

I heard Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) saying, “People are just like camels, out of one hundred, one can hardly find a single camel suitable to ride.”

     18- Doubt History

“History is written by the winners” heard it from Don Quete in One Piece. Winners are not necessarily the righteous side. So, be careful when you read history.

      19- We know nothing

Professor Ali Muqaibel once told us that we know nothing. He gave an example of the sense of smell in dogs. Dogs can smell scents in manner that no technology can do. Somepeople think that science already found everything about our world. I believe not, I believe what left to be discovered is much greater than what have been discovered.

     20-The world respects CASH

This is one of the harsh things that I forced myself to accept. I was trying by all my energy to reject this fact. But it is the reality. Do not change reality; do not bother yourself to change it.

     20- Cultural Anthropology is the best class

Your way is not the only one. As you see yourself, 100% right, others do. Change your perspective of the world. See it from different angles. Know more about others. Know more about yourself. Enjoy the difference, embrace it, and seek out for it.

     22- You need to be rich to be creative.

The word “rich” in the sentence does not necessarily means the abundance of money as much as its meaning of the abundance of the feeling of having everything you need. People that do not have the ability to surpass the thinking of how they can manage providing their daily need of food will not be able to be creative. I can see this clearly in many fields. Lets say in press, if the company gives its journalists a huge number of posts and articles per month; the employee will not be able to produce High quality work. He will be running to reach the target, the same in sales, and the same in life. Creativity, high quality and improvement needs abundance of blessings either physically or spiritually.

     23- Remembering Death is a Cure

Mortality is one of the facts that cannot be denied ( tell now ). For me, I always use death to calm myself. Whenever is become angry about something, I remember that I will die, and they will die. Nothing is that important to make you angry. I keep saying these sentences and I calm down.

     24- Objectivity vs Sympathy

Being objective is fine. Being an empathic sympathic objective person is super fine. I force myself to be objective whenever I feel that I am judging someone else badly; so that objectivity will stop me from being unfair to them.

     25- Can We Proof that Hard Work Pays Off?

This question always comes to my mind. I really do not know a solid answer for it. Maybe the next years will clarify this point for me.